But...for some people, in this issue and discussion, those boxes can be useful. At least in the sense of "this is my box. By owning this box, I am owning certain assumptions and privileges or not owning them." Which...still useful.

Oh! That's very true. Because there are people that fit in boxes that need to have their voice heard and not just be shlepped into that other.

But in doing that, it also creates the problem you're experiencing of your round peg not fitting either square A or square B's holes, and it doesn't make your viewpoint or experiences any less valid than A's or B's--"privileged" or "minority".

I don't know you have to acknowledge the one issue by dismissing those that don't fit either category (or both categories). If that even makes sense.